Learning the Lingo for the love of Joe!

Living in faraway countries as I do most of the time these days, I'm begining to feel an ever increasing sense of shame at my complete lack of foreign language skills...

So I decided today to change all that starting with a 5 minute crash course in Chinese as follows:

English	Chinese
That's not right	Sum Ting Wong
Are you harboring a fugitive?	Hu Yu Hai Ding
See me ASAP	Kum Hia Nao
Stupid Man	Dum Fuk
Small Horse	Tai Ni Po Ni
Did you go to the beach?	Wai Yu So Tan
I bumped into a coffee table	Ai Bang Mai Fu Kin Ni
I think you need a face lift	Chin Tu Fat
It's very dark in here	Wai So Dim
I thought you were on a diet	Wai Yu Mun Ching
This is a tow away zone	No Pah King
Our meeting is scheduled next week	Wai Yu Kum Nao
Staying out of sight	Lei Ying Lo
He's cleaning his automobile	Wa Shing Ka
Your body odor is offensive	Yu Stin Ki Pu
Great	Fa Kin Su Pa

Well I tried these newly learned phrases on my Chinese colleagues at the office and, well, I don't know if I'm doing it right because I seem to be getting the 'stupid man' expression on their faces (see Chinese equivalent above). Uhm... maybe I'm not pronouncing the tones right!?

Anyway, I did find a really useful online website for a crash course learning of the Chinese lingo >> Learn Real Chinese The good old BBC for you eh!

If only the BBC would do something on learning Vietnamese. I mean... I've no excuse for NOT learning the Vietnamese Lingo being that I have a Vietnamese wife. My Dear has promised me lessons but I'm still waiting... or I've been procrastinating... or something...

SO WHAT"S SPURRED THIS LAZY ENGLISHMAN TO HAVE A CRACK AT LEARNING THE LINGO?

Well if you really wanna know... It's that bloody blog by >> JOE – or is that Joe Blog – Eh? Oh nevermind! This hunk of a guy must be real sexy to the Vietnamese <> because he gets several hundred comments per blog he writes – not withstanding he’s only written 25 blog entries to date. About what exactly I’m not sure… I asked my Dear, being that she’s fluent in the “Spectacular Vietnamese Vernacular” and she said… “oh nothing much Darling; why are you jealous!?”

Me? Jealous… Oh no not jealous Dear… just, well somewhere in between one of these expressions…

I googled the length and breath of the cyberworld this morning and found what I think maybe the answer to my problem and I’ve decided to myself>> “Em Hoc Tieng Viet” – Let’s learn Vietnamese – with this interesting website dedicated to providing quality teaching material for learning Vietnamese for FREE online.

I also found two other reasonably useful websites for learning Vietnamese:

http://www.seasite.niu.edu/vietnamese/VNLanguage/SupportNS/tableofcontent.htm

http://www.nhandan.com.vn/english/culture/studyvn/index.htm

I have to say that my heart has yearned

To say to the one who has learned

from a charming Xe Om

And I’ll say oh… uhm…

Yes dear Joe

I’m gonna blow

All of my most Spectacular

In the Vietnamese Vernacular.

p.s. And here’s one for anyone who fancies themselves to make an impression on a visit to Sapa - Among the beautiful H’mong >> “Learning H’Mong” in just 30 quick lessons.

My loyal (and soon to be growing in numbers?) friends please help yourself to a slice of fresh cream cake on your way out -

Urhhhg - I feel so full now...